Please be warned that the following page may carry unpleasent conversation relating to the loss of a child. UpdateAustralia is advocating for support to parents who have had to go through this. While we encourage you to help us make a difference, please be warned of the possible triggers within this page, and the conversational threads that correlate with this topic.
First and foremost on behalf of everyone involved with UpdateAustralia we are deeply sorry for your loss. Whether you have miscarried at any stage, or gone through the trauma of a stillbirth no matter how recent.
Our hearts go out to you, we feel the need to explain that this page isn't designed to bring back memories that may upset you, this page, our advocacy and the discussional topics that are contained within this website are aimed to share resources, to show that you aren't alone, and to advocate for change to the support given to all parents who, like many of us, have gone through these tragic circumstances.
For many of us we have been there. You find out the joyess news that you are expecting, you let a select few know, others 'weren't born yesterday' and figure it all out on their own. You start dreaming and thinking, is it a boy? a girl? and let's be honest for some... whose the father?
You start noticing the advertisements on television, radio and the usual social media pages all of a sudden seem to be all about pregnancy and babies. You get sucked in and start buying a couple things, a couple nuteral outfits, maybe a pram that someone is selling on Gumtree or Facebook Marketplace.
Maybe... just maybe you and your partner have decided, or at the very least discussed, names.
But then it happens. Maybe you notice some light spotting, start feeling some cramping pains, or maybe you notice that your breasts aren't as tender, and the morning sickness start to subside.
You end up getting worried enough, or your mother/in-law nags you enough you go to the doctor. You find out you have suffered a miscarriage, or are suffering a miscarriage. You may be prescribed misoprostol (Cytotec), or be booked in for the suction procedure. Your days of being pregnant are over, you go home - those who knew are 'sorry for your loss', the nursery you had started to put together sits, soon... for all of those around you life goes back to normal relatively quickly.
Other expecteding parents skip this step and carry their baby further into the gestation period. They find out the sex, decide on a name and even put the nursery together...
But then they notice bleeding from their vaginal area, maybe they notice the baby not moving as much. They call for an appointment with the doctor or the hospital who order and ultrasound and discover there is no heartbeat for the baby.
Depending on how far along they are, and their medical conditions some women will need to give birth straight away - however it is often safe to wait and go into labor on their own which usually starts within 2 weeks of the babies passing inside the womb. Doctors, in consultation with the family, may conduct a surgical procedure known as Dilation and evacuation (D and E), they most common is inducing labor where the midwife may break your water (amniotic sac), and some expectant parents opt for the Cesarean birth (c-section).
No matter the way it comes about the expectant parents are no longer...
No matter what scenario you may have previously been involved in, either way, you have lost your baby.
Medical Experts say that over half of all fertilised eggs are unknowingly lost due to miscarriage in its first two weeks!
What we are advocating for!
UpdateAustralia are advocating for better after care for parents who have suffered the tragic loss of a miscarriage or still birth pregnancy. For most mothers once the procedure has been completed they are effectively left by themselves. Through our advocacy we'd like to see additional support, in particular the 'after care' for parents. This includes but not limited to a health care professional conducting at least one 'at home' visit and great mental health support for both parents.
Want to share your ideas on how we can better support parents who have gone through this tragedy? Come and chat here